Monday, February 6, 2012

You'll Do As You Want

Dear Olive,

It doesn't matter what time I put you to bed, after a month of trying a later bed time, you will still wake at 7. Ironically it is 7:45a right now and you are still asleep, but it's a fluke. At least it's given me a unexpected minute to write a post to you.

I have been slightly envious of my friends whose babies are not in full walking swing yet, and I wish I'd taken the advice of everyone who told me, "Enjoy it while she doesn't walk!" You don't just walk. . . you toddle, run, do circles around the house, and are constantly moving from the moment you wake up until you (maybe a take a nap) or go to bed. You have so much energy it's amazing, and exhausting!

I watched a friend's baby sit on a pillow on her first birthday and open presents. I thought aloud, "Wow, Olive would never sit like that" and I was envious as I kept having to get up to make sure you didn't run out of the building and into the street.

Her father replied, "I trained her in Daddy Day Care."

It made me think, am I a bad mother? Do people look at me and think, "Oh there goes that rebellious Olive and her nonchalant mother!"

I'm pretty sure he was kidding, plus the baby isn't quite running around yet. But it made me think, at what age do you start forcing a baby to sit still or "behave" a certain way? I asked my pediatrician the same thing a while back, when you would not sit in your high chair in restaurants. He said it was best to just avoid places like that since you don't understand.

But at what point do we move from you not understanding to you just not listening? I'm sure it's coming. . . the day you try to squiggle out of my arms and run around and I have to force you to sit in my lap. What will happen? Will you scream and make a scene? Will you give up and be ok?

I don't take you to formal things, you're a toddler. But if I have to, what will happen?

You've always been different than your baby friends we know. And they are different than their baby friends. You're all very unique and it's so cute to witness the differences. But you've always had a lot of spirit and spunk, and I'm beginning to wonder when it's going to catch up with me!