I had some time to myself tonight, and I wasn't sure exactly how to use it... I mean, I could not even narrow it down, I was too excited. Don't take it personal little OG, but we all need some ME time. Trust me you'll use that phrase someday. And maybe only new moms will understand how precious one or two hours of ME time really is.
Well unfortunately I TOTALLY BLEW IT.
I decided to stroll through the mall and maybe find something new to wear that does not feel like maternity clothes. But as I was walking I realized I would love to get my hair washed and blow dried nice and straight. A little pampering if you will. I stopped at the first salon I came to- big mistake.
The gal was just sitting there in the empty salon, looking confused when I asked how much for a wash and dry. After a long pause she asked, "25?"
Ok deal! I mean, how do you mess up a wash and a dry?????
First of all, I'm pretty sure she never even got my hair wet. It felt like she got it wet in some places, yes. But in under a minute we were up and moving back to her chair. I'm like, "Did you condition it?" Apparently she did.
Then she proceeds to rip a paddle brush through my curly sort of wet hair and sprays "leave in conditioner" spritzer while she blow dries like crazy. Then she started flat ironing and I finally look over... to my horror, my hair looks greasier and dirtier than it was before! And it smelled like dirty-wet hair.
I asked her what was going on and she blamed it on the wrong choice of shampoo. Should I just deal with it? Now it's well on it's way to being 30 minutes in and I kind of wanted to do some shopping. But I REALLY wanted my hair done. You know me, I have crazy curly intense hair that lately is just swept into a horrible bun.
I want to feel pretty for a change!
So back to the washer bowl we went. Hm... this time around I actually felt some suds and some scrubbing... just a little, but enough to know my hair was actually getting washed. I asked her why she didn't just use a round brush and blow dry it straight like most hair stylists. She replied it was a preference thing. (Most good hair stylists can get my hair straight without the use of a flat iron.)
Anyway apparently she changed her mind and decided to try round brushing now. OUCH. I couldn't stand it. I was waiting and it was just as frizzy as if she were blow drying it all wild, so I asked her to just please just dry it normal if she was going to have to use the flat iron anyway. Let's get on with it already! I didn't say that of course.
So then she proceeds to take huge chunks of my now frizzy and thick hair and runs almost half my hair at a time through her tiny flat iron. She's just going over and over and over the same thick handfuls and I thought I was going to scream.
So again, I had to say, "Do you think you could just separate it out in smaller pieces and straighten it that way?" Pretty soon I've got the owner doing one side, she's doing the other, it's been an hour and half and I've got to get home to feed you.
But here is the kicker. I came in here to destress and feel pretty. What does she say to me as she turns me around to present my new hair?
"Oh my gosh you look so different! When you came in here I thought you were so old... but when you said you were 28 I was just shocked. You look so much older."
I think she was trying to make me feel better about her performance like, wow look what I turned you into! But it had the opposite effect. I am always a mess, I am 25 pounds overweight, I never have time to do my hair or makeup, and the last thing I need to hear is how OLD I look.
But the (second) kicker is the last thing she said as I was getting up to go. "Oh that shirt is cute, is that a maternity shirt?"
No, it's not. It's just big and cozy because nothing fits me, which ironically is why I was coming in to the mall in the first place!
That was hands down one of the worst ideas I've ever had. I just didn't think anyone could mess up something so simple! And I realize it was not a haircut, just a blow dry. But I was not sure how to title it at this point in the evening!
I finally got home to you and I was so happy, my little cuddle bug. I have so many blogs to write about you! Next time I get some ME time, maybe I'll use it to write about OUR time. <3
This is how I felt: